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| Photo credit: 365naugodini.com |
Not so long ago, it was falsely perceived that a woman’s
place was only in the kitchen, that she
had no business involved in leadership, business, formal education, just to name a few. Those
conceptions have been laid to rest. Today will mark another day when she recognizes
how far she has come. Today’s woman is liberated. She is empowered and crossing boundaries that her foremothers could only dream of.
Thank God that He gave us a helper; I shudder to imagine
what life would be without her. Picture dishevelled men, gaunt, bearded, and
bored with not much to work for. Enter the woman and he is forced to reinvent himself
to Man version 10.0. He is compelled to become a leader, provider, priest,
protector and a lover amongst many other roles, all for her sake.
Like Adam, years before us, men have marvelled at the
stunning creation God brought forth. Sometimes as a man I can get bedazzled.
Visually, women are the fairer gender, make no mistake. Pretty or cute faces, glossy lips, captivating eyes, hair styled in a
myriad of ways, a soft body defined by round hips, a rounder bosom and gorgeous
legs. A woman can be a sight to behold and cause men to ogle, salivate or
even wolf-whistle. However, she was never meant to be just an object to be glorified
for her sexual appeal, she was to be a companion, a helper and a person to be
loved.
In so many ways do they compliment us men and share the
image and likeness of God. Like God they love, showing love to us as men, to children, to the vulnerable
orphans, the disabled, the elderly and even abandoned pets. Rarely do they hold back
but give it full-throttle. Whether it’s showing care or affection or merely
giving, their love has made champions of us.
Like our
creator, they are artists who appreciate and revel in beauty. Whether its beauty in the form of
fashion, beauty in the form of decor, beauty in the form of ornaments,
jewellery and other accessories. Women make things, places and themselves
beautiful as our heavenly creator made what was good and lovely to see.
Women are strong, a different kind of strength to our
masculine physicality. It is amazing how a woman can be battling breast cancer, have her breast removed and
live each day so positively and vibrantly. She can wear a smile on her face yet
have the deepest emotional scars from past physical abuse, undeserved
slandering, the untimely loss of a close friend, relative or worse her very own
baby. How they manage to pick up the pieces after their hearts have been
shattered is remarkable.
They are intelligent with the added advantage of an
open-minded nature enabling them to adapt to changing times. For so long denied a right to education, they are now
thriving academically and have the careers and positions to prove it. The fact that more
women are taking leadership positions is testament to their immense intellect and
personality. Equally impressive is their emotional intelligence that enables
them to deduce the mood of another person thus avoid saying or doing things
that will cause offense. An intelligence that can be lacking in some and make an already bad situation, worse. Perhaps, this is why they wield so much influence over
men.
Quite a creation, then, we must say to God. Her self-worth
is colossal. Incredulously, she forgets her worth because quite often it is
trampled upon. Voices of female discontent are strident on the airwaves and social
media . They have been taken for a ride with men being the prime culprits.
Sometimes women have been reduced to mere objects from which to derive sexual
pleasure. Contemporary urban culture has propagated this misconception as it
has seen the rise of video-vixens, an overly sexualized form of socialite or
IT-girl, all who revel in liberally parading their bodies for affirmation. Not to mention that rape
is still pervasive today with scores of perpetrators going scot-free or given ultra-lenient
punishments. The laxity with which rape cases are treated at Police headquarters
makes for depressing news.
It’s so common to hear a lady suffer from heartbreak because
yet again a man was not after her heart but her body. Too many times, women have given their time,
given their affection, given their bodies, given material possessions only for
a man to take away their respect, take
away their love, take away their worth and give so little in return. As a
result of all the taking, women have been depleted only left with bitter
memories and resentment. The pain has
driven some to become cold, hard and deeply distrustful of men. Men have thus been
labelled public enemy no 1.
In light of these observations, I thought to myself, that being a God-fearing,
hardworking, and generally nice guy, a relationship would be easy since I was
different. How wrong I was. Dozens of mistakes later, I have come to understand
it takes much more to love a woman. Thankfully I have a head-start, Christ.
You see God has lavished with us so many gifts as men. The
first gift, he gave us was Woman. She was to be our suitable companion, our
helper. When Adam sinned, and so many men followed till we sank so
low in the depths of sin, far from God, He lovingly reached out to us and gave us another gift, the
very best gift in fact, his very own son Jesus.
His son humbly and willingly came to earth to live amongst men, to show them who
God was, what he was like and bridge the gulf between God and Men that sin had created. He was the
God-man who gave himself as the ultimate sacrifice to die for our many past
mistakes inclusive of the many women’s hearts we have broken provided we just
confess our past transgressions and believe that He can save us, as well as
accepting him into our lives as our Lord.
As a result of accepting Jesus into my life, I can say that
my casual altitude towards women and in extension, relationships has changed. It wasn’t instantaneous but a gradual change. I will be quick to say that too often I viewed women as sexual objects.
Too often, I craned my neck to gawk at another manzi wa Nairobi, minus the
gigagagaing of Nonini. Too many times, my eyes have been like a Bluetooth
device seeking to pair with the prettiest face, the most revealing cleavage,
the roundest derriere, and the longest legs behind the short skirts. Slowly and steadily,
God has worked in me and made me realize that the women I lust after her are not
just objects but his daughters.
Pause. Hold that thought. A daughter of God. That’s really big!!!Let’s imagine God lived
in an earthly house and you were to ask his daughter for a date, how would you
prepare? Without doubt, you would put your life in order, ensure you look the
part, dress the part and most importantly BE the part. You would make sure you
did your homework on her likes, dislikes so that in the event her divine dad
asks you anything about his precious daughter you wouldn’t be caught flatfooted.
You would ensure you can take her on a date anywhere. Probably
a Michelin 3-star restaurant, or an AAA restaurant or even a five-diamond
restaurant would suffice. Only the finest, the very best, I mean; this is God’s
daughter, and average just won’t do. No doubt, you would be shaking as you
knocked the front door. Unquestionably when He opened the door and your eyes
gazed upon the entire glory of God, you would be overawed and probably even
forget you were taking out his daughter for a date and focus your attention on
him!!!
I’m guessing if He told the two of you to be back by 11, you
would be back by 9:30, latest!!! African time would be a concept you have never heard of ! You would thank him profusely as you vigorously shake his
hand in typical Luhnje style and then draw it out of embarrassment, because you realized you got too star-struck. When on the date, you would be the gentleman
par excellence. You wouldn’t require any motivation to push doors for her or
pull chairs for her; those things would just come naturally!!! You would make
your order and then instinctively make her order as well (You did your homework
on her after all). The whole evening you would be mesmerized by her appearance,
compliment her, and engage her in deep conversation. It is highly likely that
you will have swept her off her feet so much so that at the end of the night,
she may be pressurizing you to take things to the next level! But then, you
remember her Dad, You have a premonition that things don’t work out after you let her have her way. After that one night of passion, you quickly lose interest. You then visualize her
sobbing in his arms after the messy break-up, you see her broken and then you
realize you messed up HIS daughter and so you messed with HIM!!! GASP!!! No way
that’s going to happen!!! You muster incredible amounts of self-control ,
against all bodily desires and societal norms, you politely decline her advances ; stating that
you respect her and her father and think it’s too soon. You then drive her back
home well before cut-off time and thank the Almighty for granting you the
distinguished pleasure of taking his daughter out.
Friends, that’s my life, though there may be many beautiful
women, as a result of having Jesus in my life, I remember their Father, God and realize I can't afford to make silly mistakes.
Some women may have their life in order, others are broken, some may be too
keen on making themselves sex symbols but they are all his daughters therefore I respect them. I
therefore try to curb my sexual inclinations because since I am not ready to
have a family of my own why bother leading on his daughter only to break her
heart?
I have had to remind myself of Job making a covenant with his eyes not to look lustfully at a woman(Job 31:1) and do the same. I don't always hack it but that doesn't keep me from trying. It isn't a matter of whining because of the revealing clothing and trying to dictate what clothing they wear in essence limiting their freedom so that my freedom may be enhanced. No, the battle with lust starts with me, and it means at the slightest hint of seeing too much, I look away. In addition to my eyes, with Jesus, I can let God reign in my mind, after all I am to love the Lord, my God with all my heart, with all my soul and with all my mind.(Matthew 25:37) No matter the bevy of beauties around, I try to take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ(2 Corinthians 10:5) so that I win the battle of purity at the most important place, my mind and prevent my thoughts wandering.
His daughter is royalty, I will let him work on my character and let him
develop me into a prince deserving of her. God gave man stewardship over all creation including woman. She is not really man’s but God's, we are only keeping her in trust of him. When
our time is done, I believe He will inquire of our stewardship. I desire that I have a
good answer for him, that I took good care of her, that I was a good steward who made her blossom rather than wither.
This women’s day, one gem of a woman, our very own
First-lady, Margaret Kenyatta will be leading other strong women as they run a
half marathon to raise funds for the Beyond Zero initiative. How befitting,
that on women’s day, our first lady and so many others will epitomize
womanhood displaying true beauty, grace and love, all for the common good, to make a sacrifice and give cheerfully and wholeheartedly to others. Plaudits have been numerous for
the first lady and she doesn’t stand alone. Many women have transformed the
lives of their family, their community and the world, we owe them our gratitude.
We therefore celebrate women. They are truly God’s gift to us. Mother, wife,
girlfriend, colleague, whoever they may be, we thank God for women.
Happy Women’s day!!!
